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May. 12th, 2013 06:02 pmIt's Mother's Day! So go hug your mom, or call her, or send her an email, or a text just to say, "Mom. Mom. MOM. Mom. Mums. MOMMY. MOoooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOoooooM. Hi."
Y'know, torture her. It's fun.
In other news, this morning at around 2:15, I found that my faith in humanity, which has always been a little on the low side, dipped dangerously into the "are you kidding me?!" zone when a regular at work brought up two half gallons of chocolate milk and asked for a pack of cigs. He then spent the next five minutes attempting to tuck a shirt I'm not sure he was wearing into his underwear (...yes.) and then didn't have enough for all three things. He just wanted the cigs. So he took the milk back and when he came back up I noticed his hoodie was looking a little... rectangular. But our store has a policy of "don't accuse if you didn't see them actually take it." And of fucking course our guard was off looking at god knows what, so I couldn't even say, psssst. Either that guy's pregnant with a brick or he just swiped some milk. So I hurried over to the cooler where there were two containers, but one was pushed really far back, like it would be if there had been three containers and only one was returned. (The third, the one waaay in the back, wouldn't slide because gravity feeds only work half the time.)
Sonofabitch. Dude, you come in nightly. You also are the ONLY white guy who smokes L&M reds (short!) so I know exactly who the fuck you are. If K were working tonight I'd call and have her rip this kid a new one because she would.
If you have to choose between cigarettes and milk, you choose the fucking milk. Or you, I dunno, don't steal from a place where you are a fucking regular.
Chocolate milk, it appears, is my breaking point.
Today Mums let me sleep in because she thought the boy was going to make her breakfast. Only that didn't happen. But she also didn't ask me to make her breakfast when I did get up. (I asked.) I pointed out the bag of bread I'd bought this morning and made Widget lunch (that he fed to the dog) and then Widget neglected to do anything he was told to do other than wash the dog (which I was going to do with him) so I have to murder him when he comes home. I also made a cake, cleaned the counter island off because the Kali cat was displeased and shared that the way a cat knows how. Vacuumed up here, put down flea powder and washed the cat box and dishes...
For someone who hasn't been up for more than four hours, I feel accomplished. Now to go see what Mums would like for dinner.
Y'know, torture her. It's fun.
In other news, this morning at around 2:15, I found that my faith in humanity, which has always been a little on the low side, dipped dangerously into the "are you kidding me?!" zone when a regular at work brought up two half gallons of chocolate milk and asked for a pack of cigs. He then spent the next five minutes attempting to tuck a shirt I'm not sure he was wearing into his underwear (...yes.) and then didn't have enough for all three things. He just wanted the cigs. So he took the milk back and when he came back up I noticed his hoodie was looking a little... rectangular. But our store has a policy of "don't accuse if you didn't see them actually take it." And of fucking course our guard was off looking at god knows what, so I couldn't even say, psssst. Either that guy's pregnant with a brick or he just swiped some milk. So I hurried over to the cooler where there were two containers, but one was pushed really far back, like it would be if there had been three containers and only one was returned. (The third, the one waaay in the back, wouldn't slide because gravity feeds only work half the time.)
Sonofabitch. Dude, you come in nightly. You also are the ONLY white guy who smokes L&M reds (short!) so I know exactly who the fuck you are. If K were working tonight I'd call and have her rip this kid a new one because she would.
If you have to choose between cigarettes and milk, you choose the fucking milk. Or you, I dunno, don't steal from a place where you are a fucking regular.
Chocolate milk, it appears, is my breaking point.
Today Mums let me sleep in because she thought the boy was going to make her breakfast. Only that didn't happen. But she also didn't ask me to make her breakfast when I did get up. (I asked.) I pointed out the bag of bread I'd bought this morning and made Widget lunch (that he fed to the dog) and then Widget neglected to do anything he was told to do other than wash the dog (which I was going to do with him) so I have to murder him when he comes home. I also made a cake, cleaned the counter island off because the Kali cat was displeased and shared that the way a cat knows how. Vacuumed up here, put down flea powder and washed the cat box and dishes...
For someone who hasn't been up for more than four hours, I feel accomplished. Now to go see what Mums would like for dinner.