yaaaaaaaaaawn

  I'm hungry and there's pretty much nothing to eat. Woe is me. I've spent the last forever trying to find the school supply list for Widget's impending doom, and I can't find a damn thing. Guys! Send it out or put it on your shitty, shitty, shitty website already. Sales are going on and I'm getting impatient.
   There's this teacher's supply volunteer place that basically gives supplies to teachers from schools that are, let's face it, beyond poor. I'm tempted to email and ask if they're in need of help on Mondays, since I could do that. On the other hand, social anxiety means that while I find the idea of helping fab, the idea of actually doing it? Kinda scares me. Hmm. Still, might mention it to Mumsy. Hell, might email anyway. I'm just trying to figure out if I actually want to do it, or if I'm only interested because it seems interesting and hell, I'm in need of something new to fill the void.

 Of course, the void isn't exactly new. It hasn't even officially been confirmed, though I'm saying that the lack of confirmation is exactly that-confirmation. Cass is miffed because he hasn't replied to her, and thus she feels that she isn't scary enough. He should be. She gets these ideas into her head and actually follows through. I have no doubt that if she wanted to, she'd hunt him down and kick his ass. It doesn't hurt that he ain't that much taller than she is.

  Yes, it's come to that. I'm making short jokes at his expense. But he's the one throwing me away, so in return I'll make all the short jokes I want. I might forgive, eventually, the complete destruction of the relationship, because heaven knows I've pulled the plug more than once, so it was bound to happen the other way... even if I do maintain that he last time I told him goodbye, he pushed me there. But the part that's kicking me in the kidneys and making my jaw lock is the part where we've been friends for so long that I'm not entirely sure what to do with myself without that. I don't even have anything to compare that to, y'know? Of course the thought of saying a damn thing to him at the moment is enough to make me want to punch someone, so... I dunno.

  It's sinking in, slowly. I kind of thought that maybe since I saw something coming, maybe I'd have prepared myself enough that I'd just move along and it wouldn't knock me down or out. Now I'm thinking that I was an idiot. Can't blame a girl for hoping.

I dreamt about the perfect car last night. When I woke up, I couldn't remember a damn thing. Which is a bit distressing as cars don't interest me and this car was perfect for me. Perfect. Siiiiiigh. Of course, I was distracted by the weirdness that followed in the dream, so... yeah.

Okay, I need something to munch and probably sleep.

Space Zombies!

Okay, it's rare that I have a dream where I'm able to wake up by simply thinking, "Okay, no, I'm done" as I close my eyes, only to open them again as I'm still in my dream, but waking up, too. To celebrate, I'll bore you with the tale of space zombies, Captain Tightpants as Superman, and Lindsay Lohan in what looked an awful lot like SWAT gear.

The dream begins at some megastore. At first I thought it was Toys R Us, backed up by the complaining that "in my day, Barbie took up 3/4 of an aisle and now she's forced to share?" Which isn't totally true. Barbie had a little more than that. But then, as we're set to leave, we notice that the top shelf on the back has old clearance stuff and some new stuff, too. She, who used to be Tracy, but now is someone shorter and with darker hair, offers to pull some of the dolls down for me and demonstrates with one of those grabber things my parents have. I figure what the hell, if they're left out where people can see them, they can, in theory, grab. So she demonstrates on these dolls that are in the freezer. o_O I don't really want a frozen doll [and she is, indeed, covered in ice] but some little girl comes by and wants one without uttering a damn thing about "so cool!" so for lack of puns, I reach up on tippy-toes and snag it for her. When my brunette friend goes to snag a couple of clearance dolls [Claudia Kishi. Oo!] she knocks them down behind the shelf... and then ducks through the freezer and is suddenly outside, and all I'm thinking is "That cannot be good for the food." Okay, I'm also wondering why freeze a doll [Claud wasn't in the frozen food section, btw, this was just how BF was chosing to leave the store to find the place where Claud was] but anyway. BF cannot find the doll and I peek under the rollers [wtf?] that are holding the bottom shelf up, so, really, this food should be rancid] and I point out a doll head and Claud in the distance. BF... is now a dog. Like, an actual dog. Very cute. Very, very weird. She brings Claud to me, but now Claud is just a messed up torso, but BF-dog-form didn't eat her or anything. It's just enough for me to say to hell with this.

I resume the looking at the top shelf and suddenly BF is Cass and we've bypassed the new dolls because I'm not sure they should be sold, but we find this cool book bag/binder combo that I actually really want. It's got Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends and two other cartoons [I don't remember the other two. One might've been Bubbles from the Powerpuff Girls?] so Cass and I pick out our bags and then her stepfather appears and they talk about how he hasn't heard from her and how he's dyed his hair and something about her brother/his son going out for films and as they do that, Cass points out nifty lipglosses and things, and then she bids him farewell. She walks away as I'm gathering my stuff and then calls out for me to grab this lipgloss-sized/shaped thing of hair color and says that it, an actual lipgloss, and something else are free with the purchase. Score? Sure. So we debate colors and finally gather our stuff, though it takes me a little longer and she's pretty much at checkout, when someone walks by, looking an awful lot like Captain Tightpants, and he's trying to get someone to call a code 911 and the other person is acting like he's insane. Fair enough, all things considered. Cass is waiting and for some reason I go back to where I picked up my stuff and throw everything but the bag back and notice a familiar redhead. I've somehow decided to shriek "Code 911!" and all hell breaks loose. The lights cut and it's now more of the blue light space movies have, and LL is all outfitted in her black SWAT-looking gear and trying to get people to move to the damn exits, which isn't helped by someone announcing over the speakers, "We're gonna crash! Get out, get out, get out!"

Brilliant. It's chaos and people are lost and confused and I just want to get the hell out of there. Captain Tightpants comes running by screaming at people to leave by the most direct way possible, and to demonstrate he runs through a freezer that leads to another aisle, and effectively cuts out having to go around, but before anyone follows, he comes out three doors down and says that exit is... full. So he races to the next and we, like lemmings, follow. Halfway, he starts to fly and I swear, he's now in a Superman outfit. He flies straight into this blip of light and a gazillion people follow. I'm worried I won't be able to find Cass afterwards if I don't go out the same exit she did, so I head towards that one [it's not that far] and then the light dims a little more, but also becomes harsher somehow, and then people come out of the light. Stumbling. Like zombies. Shit. I stop running/floating [damn you, gravity!] and someone behind me points out that if we stagger around, the zombies won't eat us. Fair enough. Only I can't stop floating and the nearest group of zombies notices me, stares right at me with their too blue eyes, and I have time to think, "SHIT!" and then wake myself up.