Day 12: Acoustic #3

   This was going to be a thing on the album, Dizzy Up The Girl (which is awesome and it's very hard to believe that it's 14 years old) but then I realized that while the album was amazing and probably did change my life, it was this song that probably saved it and possibly a few other people's (that I know).

  It's a very, very short song (under two minutes) and it's more than a little sad, but there's a story or three lurking inside, which is something I love more than is probably healthy.

   I was seventeen when this was released and I should have been in my senior year of high school. I wasn't for reasons we'll get into later, but I will say that everyone has a breaking point and by the time my junior year ended, I'd more than reached mine. Thing is, no one realized (not even me) how close I was to breaking completely. I dealt with this by shutting down pretty much across the board. If you couldn't feel anything, you couldn't feel how desperately unhappy you were, right?
  Which is great* when you do it by choice, but when it's the culmination of being verbally bullied over an extended period of time, odds are good you don't realize you've done it until you realize that you can't feel anything. At all.
   That's a scary feeling to say the least. But how do you fix it? I wish I had the answer for that, but all I've got is this song. I'd listen to it over and over and over and even though it made me cry (it still does, honestly) it was something and I could work with something.

  So this became my go to song for writing and for trying to help someone else break through when things tried to drag them down. Of course, you can't save someone who isn't willing, so sometimes you just have to sit there and wait for them to come around. Even if that person is just you.



And I tried so hard to reach you
but you're falling anyway

and you know I see right through you
cause the world gets in your way
what's the point in all this screaming
you're not listening anyway

I'm sure I caused my fair share of the last couple of lines being used against me and I sure as hell used them on someone else but I'm pretty sure this song saved me more than once, even if I didn't realize it at the time.


*- Obviously not great.