![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Possibly last of the holiday movies
Dec. 27th, 2022 10:30 amSpent yesterday watching holiday movies.
The Christmas House is one I remembered hearing about but didn't really remember why until I watched it and then went ohhhhhhhhh, this is the one where Hallmark officially remembered gay people exist and threw in a gay couple as their third to round out the story.
Mike has a really terrible TV show (Handsome Justice and no, I'm not making that title up) that's about to be cancelled despite decent ratings because the network just changed hands. As he's wrapping up on set, two weeks before Christmas Eve (this is a plot point), he gets a call from his parents asking him to come home and help them do the Christmas House for the first time in 20 years. Mike agrees and heads home, as do his brother Brandon and Brandon's husband, Jake. Because I spaced out initially, I thought the Christmas House was a second home the Mitchell parents owned but no. These crazy people move all their normal shit out of the house and go balls to the wall holiday nuts in their own home and have people walk through.
In a "no way!" move, Mike's old love interest, Andi, is back in town, and I believe she's the literal girl next door. Now she's the mom next door but fear not, as her son's father is out of the country levels of out of the picture. (That's for the sequel, darlings.) We find out that Mike used to be super into magic and Andi was his assistant. I'm gonna be honest and say every flashback to the pivotal moment in their relationship made me internally howl with laughter because the actor they cast as younger!Mike looks like he's wearing makeup meant to mimic a ventriloquist's dummy. It is distractedly bad. Also annoying, neither talks to the other about why their friendship/partnership died. Andi went to kiss him under mistletoe at a holiday party but Mike was so distracted by his magic trick not working that he didn't even notice. The trick, btw, was an elaborate way of giving her a necklace, and when he turned back, Andi had walked off with one of the jocks who had been laughing (at him and his bad makeup?) earlier.
Mike's parents are acting WEIRD and you spend a little bit wondering if Mom's dying and then you realize nope, they're separating. That's why they're selling the house and why they're insisting on doing the Christmas House ONE LAST TIME.
Meanwhile, you've got Brandon and Jake also keeping secrets, namely that they've been trying to adopt and after three failures, they're in a really painful place. It doesn't help that Brandon's got issues with Mike that we'll really get into in the sequel.
For all the cheesy elements, this one works better than it has a right to. My only real complaint is that there's next to no chemistry really with Andi and Mike. I've seen worse (this year, no less) but it's just... eh. I do absolutely buy Mike falling in love with the idea of being a stepdad to Noah, though, and their bonding is cute.
The end does feel weird when you've got two of the three couples kissing and it's the gay couple not being included but they do kiss earlier in the movie so I guess they decided one and done?
The Christmas House 2:
After Mike buys The Christmas House and promises to keep the legacy alive, two years (three?) have passed and after a disaster the year before (note to anyone dumber than Mike: iron reindeer on the roof is a bad, bad idea), Mike is ready for a quiet, chill holiday at home. Jake is also hoping for this, as he and Brandon trek back to the Christmas House/Andi's house with their two kids in tow. Brandon, however, is kind of itching for a fight. Things aren't helped when Mike's agent convinces the family to bully Mike into accepting a holiday reality show, Deck Those Halls. Mike's initial co-star has to back out and Brandon is tapped because who can say no to sibling rivalry?
Thing is, I'm on team Brandon for a good chunk of the saner stuff. Mike gets a free pass for a LOT of shit and it absolutely makes sense that he'd be annoyed about that, about having his brother be on a godawful show and having his parents sell him the childhood home and everyone loves Mike and it's an impossible thing to live up to, especially as a new parent. Brandon is definitely his mother's son as he goes overboard a LOT.
But I get it.
Mike's inability to grasp why his brother might have some aggression is kind of stupid, but he is distracted by Andi's ex, Zane, coming back into the picture and easily kicking Mike to the stepdad curb in Noah's eyes. Zane punched a shark for crying out loud, and you know Mike knows Handsome Justice isn't great television, so he puts off asking Andi to marry him and justifies it with the time not being right.
The brothers fight like crazy (no way in hell would any store have that much Christmas stuff left that close to Christmas, btw) and even get kicked out of their parents' weird play thing that makes NO SENSE and I'm thankful we didn't have to sit through more of it.
This movie works better than it has a right to.
Christmas Encore:
I chose this one based on my love of Maggie Lawson. It... wasn't terrible, but it wasn't great. Charlotte's an actress just one audition away from greatness but we all know she's not going to get that commercial she's trying out for. Mostly because she's kind of bad at the audition, which is weird since the rest of the movie hinges on the idea that she's actually a great actress who just hasn't found the right role to shine in. K.
We learn Charlotte is an actress with the world's most understanding boss and despite it being the holiday season, she has time to read on the clock. A lot. How are you paying any bills, ma'am? We also learn she absolutely hates this actor named Julian because they have a past and yes, we are going to see his stupid face all over this movie and I'll be honest, I nearly stopped when he appeared fully because they initially styled him like an early 2000's spiky haired douche. Yes. That's all it took.
Turns out that while Charlotte hates Julian, he still thinks of her fondly and since he's directing a play and she's an actress... you see where this is going. Second time I nearly called it quits was when the movie decided a genderbent Scrooge was novel and that we'd be calling her Erlinda AND that she'd be a cubicle dwelling drone. Mmm...kay.
To add some tension, we've got Charlotte's best friend finding her a job back in Chicago and everyone keeps thinking Julian's dating his old costar but won't listen when he says anything to the contrary AND of course the old theater is being closed by an actual Scrooge and they have to save it!
Right. Right.
Maggie's a delight. I came around on her costar and didn't want to deck 'im. The rest of the movie was just... Erlinda? Really?
The Christmas House is one I remembered hearing about but didn't really remember why until I watched it and then went ohhhhhhhhh, this is the one where Hallmark officially remembered gay people exist and threw in a gay couple as their third to round out the story.
Mike has a really terrible TV show (Handsome Justice and no, I'm not making that title up) that's about to be cancelled despite decent ratings because the network just changed hands. As he's wrapping up on set, two weeks before Christmas Eve (this is a plot point), he gets a call from his parents asking him to come home and help them do the Christmas House for the first time in 20 years. Mike agrees and heads home, as do his brother Brandon and Brandon's husband, Jake. Because I spaced out initially, I thought the Christmas House was a second home the Mitchell parents owned but no. These crazy people move all their normal shit out of the house and go balls to the wall holiday nuts in their own home and have people walk through.
In a "no way!" move, Mike's old love interest, Andi, is back in town, and I believe she's the literal girl next door. Now she's the mom next door but fear not, as her son's father is out of the country levels of out of the picture. (That's for the sequel, darlings.) We find out that Mike used to be super into magic and Andi was his assistant. I'm gonna be honest and say every flashback to the pivotal moment in their relationship made me internally howl with laughter because the actor they cast as younger!Mike looks like he's wearing makeup meant to mimic a ventriloquist's dummy. It is distractedly bad. Also annoying, neither talks to the other about why their friendship/partnership died. Andi went to kiss him under mistletoe at a holiday party but Mike was so distracted by his magic trick not working that he didn't even notice. The trick, btw, was an elaborate way of giving her a necklace, and when he turned back, Andi had walked off with one of the jocks who had been laughing (at him and his bad makeup?) earlier.
Mike's parents are acting WEIRD and you spend a little bit wondering if Mom's dying and then you realize nope, they're separating. That's why they're selling the house and why they're insisting on doing the Christmas House ONE LAST TIME.
Meanwhile, you've got Brandon and Jake also keeping secrets, namely that they've been trying to adopt and after three failures, they're in a really painful place. It doesn't help that Brandon's got issues with Mike that we'll really get into in the sequel.
For all the cheesy elements, this one works better than it has a right to. My only real complaint is that there's next to no chemistry really with Andi and Mike. I've seen worse (this year, no less) but it's just... eh. I do absolutely buy Mike falling in love with the idea of being a stepdad to Noah, though, and their bonding is cute.
The end does feel weird when you've got two of the three couples kissing and it's the gay couple not being included but they do kiss earlier in the movie so I guess they decided one and done?
The Christmas House 2:
After Mike buys The Christmas House and promises to keep the legacy alive, two years (three?) have passed and after a disaster the year before (note to anyone dumber than Mike: iron reindeer on the roof is a bad, bad idea), Mike is ready for a quiet, chill holiday at home. Jake is also hoping for this, as he and Brandon trek back to the Christmas House/Andi's house with their two kids in tow. Brandon, however, is kind of itching for a fight. Things aren't helped when Mike's agent convinces the family to bully Mike into accepting a holiday reality show, Deck Those Halls. Mike's initial co-star has to back out and Brandon is tapped because who can say no to sibling rivalry?
Thing is, I'm on team Brandon for a good chunk of the saner stuff. Mike gets a free pass for a LOT of shit and it absolutely makes sense that he'd be annoyed about that, about having his brother be on a godawful show and having his parents sell him the childhood home and everyone loves Mike and it's an impossible thing to live up to, especially as a new parent. Brandon is definitely his mother's son as he goes overboard a LOT.
But I get it.
Mike's inability to grasp why his brother might have some aggression is kind of stupid, but he is distracted by Andi's ex, Zane, coming back into the picture and easily kicking Mike to the stepdad curb in Noah's eyes. Zane punched a shark for crying out loud, and you know Mike knows Handsome Justice isn't great television, so he puts off asking Andi to marry him and justifies it with the time not being right.
The brothers fight like crazy (no way in hell would any store have that much Christmas stuff left that close to Christmas, btw) and even get kicked out of their parents' weird play thing that makes NO SENSE and I'm thankful we didn't have to sit through more of it.
This movie works better than it has a right to.
Christmas Encore:
I chose this one based on my love of Maggie Lawson. It... wasn't terrible, but it wasn't great. Charlotte's an actress just one audition away from greatness but we all know she's not going to get that commercial she's trying out for. Mostly because she's kind of bad at the audition, which is weird since the rest of the movie hinges on the idea that she's actually a great actress who just hasn't found the right role to shine in. K.
We learn Charlotte is an actress with the world's most understanding boss and despite it being the holiday season, she has time to read on the clock. A lot. How are you paying any bills, ma'am? We also learn she absolutely hates this actor named Julian because they have a past and yes, we are going to see his stupid face all over this movie and I'll be honest, I nearly stopped when he appeared fully because they initially styled him like an early 2000's spiky haired douche. Yes. That's all it took.
Turns out that while Charlotte hates Julian, he still thinks of her fondly and since he's directing a play and she's an actress... you see where this is going. Second time I nearly called it quits was when the movie decided a genderbent Scrooge was novel and that we'd be calling her Erlinda AND that she'd be a cubicle dwelling drone. Mmm...kay.
To add some tension, we've got Charlotte's best friend finding her a job back in Chicago and everyone keeps thinking Julian's dating his old costar but won't listen when he says anything to the contrary AND of course the old theater is being closed by an actual Scrooge and they have to save it!
Right. Right.
Maggie's a delight. I came around on her costar and didn't want to deck 'im. The rest of the movie was just... Erlinda? Really?