LXG! and ...stuff
Jul. 14th, 2003 03:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
impySo, I saw LXG last night. Might I say I totally made the right decision in choosing between LXG and that crapfest E! calls a THS? Yes, yes I did.
Okay, I don't know what some people might consider a spoiler for this movie, so I decied I'd rather be safe than have someone beat me up. I bruise easily you know. ;)
Anyway, I won't recap the basic story because by now you should know. I will say that the movie needed a little work, some polishing, but it wasn't one of those movies you keep checking your watch to see how much longer before you're free. Unlike the Matrix. *twitch*
So, the bad part of the review. Like I said, it needed a little work. It also needed some more characterization, but it wasn't just "I am Sean Connery. Love me and accept it." They gave people backgrounds. Just, not enough to completely make you happy. Also, the big bad evil plot was kind of lost on me in parts for awhile, but that's my fault, I think. Why?
Because I was too busy laughing my freakin' head off. If you're one of those people who can't figure out why other people keep pairing those silly lil hobbits from LoTR up, then you won't get the joke here. You don't have to be the kind who's sure that all the hobbits are involved with another hobbit of the same sex, but you have to at least see why some people would think that for this movie to amuse you properly.
Characters:
Allan Quartermain: Lead role, and thus the most characterization. Not exactly a fun guy, but he had some quips [most of them are in the trailers] and you could see his storyline with Tom coming a mile away. In fact, I had to resist the urge to beat up the people who awwed and giggled at the stuff that was so obvious. Sigh. But I didn't because they didn't kill me for my gigglefests.
Now, the gigglefest of 15 minutes mainly centered around Quartermain & young Tom Sawyer who are set up as this father/son duo. Only... Tom bribes Allan with guns. Fancy tricked out guns he couldn't get anywhere else. This amused me.
Tom and Allan have some quality gun time that focuses on Allan teaching Tom not to shoot too early. Um, yeah. See, if you're not smirking now, this movie aint' for you [at least my version isn't.] okay? Good.
Tom: Completely unremarkable. The Shane West fans might as well not bother and instead support Orlando Bloom's movie. Tom is the cocky American whose accent makes him standout more than anything else he does. This accent is not a good thing, mind you. He's also Quartermain's bitch. That's about it for him this go round. Oh, sure, he pretends to want Mina, but every guy in this film does that at least once.
Nemo: He's got a very big ship. Oh yes. a verrrrry big ship. He's also got some pirate lines [you'll see] and makes quite the cute couple with Hyde. Snazzy fighting style, but in the end, it's all about the big ol' sword of the sea. [also part of the 15 minute gigglefest]
Dorian: He reminded me of some other celeb, but I don't know who. If Stuart dahling had acted this way for his Lestat role, well... QotD mightn't have been a pile of shit. Then again... maybe not. Overthetop, quippy, and downright sneaky. Perhaps my favorite of the bunch. Sigh.
Mina: Repressed and then not. Cool, always. My kind of heroine. Kind of tragic, quiet, but piss her off and well, that's the end of you, bitch. :D
and I expected M [that was 'is name, yes? Bah. too tired to check] to hop up on the table and dance and sing Like a Virgin. Yes, Moulin Rouge moment. You'll see.
Overall, I suggest you see. Bring a sense of humor, and enjoy the damn thing. Oh yes.
In other news, I'm too tired to put other news. Um, hrmm. Suggest books for those unafraid to read beneath their reading level. Goblin Wood by Hilari Bell. Faerie Wars by... someone or other. Holly Blue!
And a do not read. Hidden Leaves, or whatever the hell the last VC Andrews novel was for the Willow [De Beers] series. Crap, crap, crap, unecessary, and the editor fell asleep at the wheel, again. CRAP. Which is a shame since the last two books prior to that had shown a real grasp on changing the formula a little and making it enjoyable, despite certain errors. Alas.
*hops off to watch Eliza videos*
Okay, I don't know what some people might consider a spoiler for this movie, so I decied I'd rather be safe than have someone beat me up. I bruise easily you know. ;)
Anyway, I won't recap the basic story because by now you should know. I will say that the movie needed a little work, some polishing, but it wasn't one of those movies you keep checking your watch to see how much longer before you're free. Unlike the Matrix. *twitch*
So, the bad part of the review. Like I said, it needed a little work. It also needed some more characterization, but it wasn't just "I am Sean Connery. Love me and accept it." They gave people backgrounds. Just, not enough to completely make you happy. Also, the big bad evil plot was kind of lost on me in parts for awhile, but that's my fault, I think. Why?
Because I was too busy laughing my freakin' head off. If you're one of those people who can't figure out why other people keep pairing those silly lil hobbits from LoTR up, then you won't get the joke here. You don't have to be the kind who's sure that all the hobbits are involved with another hobbit of the same sex, but you have to at least see why some people would think that for this movie to amuse you properly.
Characters:
Allan Quartermain: Lead role, and thus the most characterization. Not exactly a fun guy, but he had some quips [most of them are in the trailers] and you could see his storyline with Tom coming a mile away. In fact, I had to resist the urge to beat up the people who awwed and giggled at the stuff that was so obvious. Sigh. But I didn't because they didn't kill me for my gigglefests.
Now, the gigglefest of 15 minutes mainly centered around Quartermain & young Tom Sawyer who are set up as this father/son duo. Only... Tom bribes Allan with guns. Fancy tricked out guns he couldn't get anywhere else. This amused me.
Tom and Allan have some quality gun time that focuses on Allan teaching Tom not to shoot too early. Um, yeah. See, if you're not smirking now, this movie aint' for you [at least my version isn't.] okay? Good.
Tom: Completely unremarkable. The Shane West fans might as well not bother and instead support Orlando Bloom's movie. Tom is the cocky American whose accent makes him standout more than anything else he does. This accent is not a good thing, mind you. He's also Quartermain's bitch. That's about it for him this go round. Oh, sure, he pretends to want Mina, but every guy in this film does that at least once.
Nemo: He's got a very big ship. Oh yes. a verrrrry big ship. He's also got some pirate lines [you'll see] and makes quite the cute couple with Hyde. Snazzy fighting style, but in the end, it's all about the big ol' sword of the sea. [also part of the 15 minute gigglefest]
Dorian: He reminded me of some other celeb, but I don't know who. If Stuart dahling had acted this way for his Lestat role, well... QotD mightn't have been a pile of shit. Then again... maybe not. Overthetop, quippy, and downright sneaky. Perhaps my favorite of the bunch. Sigh.
Mina: Repressed and then not. Cool, always. My kind of heroine. Kind of tragic, quiet, but piss her off and well, that's the end of you, bitch. :D
and I expected M [that was 'is name, yes? Bah. too tired to check] to hop up on the table and dance and sing Like a Virgin. Yes, Moulin Rouge moment. You'll see.
Overall, I suggest you see. Bring a sense of humor, and enjoy the damn thing. Oh yes.
In other news, I'm too tired to put other news. Um, hrmm. Suggest books for those unafraid to read beneath their reading level. Goblin Wood by Hilari Bell. Faerie Wars by... someone or other. Holly Blue!
And a do not read. Hidden Leaves, or whatever the hell the last VC Andrews novel was for the Willow [De Beers] series. Crap, crap, crap, unecessary, and the editor fell asleep at the wheel, again. CRAP. Which is a shame since the last two books prior to that had shown a real grasp on changing the formula a little and making it enjoyable, despite certain errors. Alas.
*hops off to watch Eliza videos*
