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impyI'm doing a bit of possible shopping. I think I'll end up going for the Audrey gift for Jackie, so I'm freeing my gift certificate up for a gift for Mumsy and Joan. Amazon has their 4-for-3 thing and the books Joan wants are all part of it, and one of the books Mumsy wants is also. I'm just trying to figure out what to add to put it over $25 for the free shipping. So. You there. Want a gift? Hints, flat out requests, betting, wishlists, whatever, are greatly appreciated. If you want a card, email me at snarkyimp. It's gmail, dahling, so since I know you all have larger than normal brains, you can do the hard part.
I've got cards! You've got empty mailboxes. I'm just attempting to locate Cosmo and Wanda who should have some addresses already. I know, I'm a mess. This year I'm tucking addresses into my Hallmark card box, in my diary, and on calendars just to name a few. Dude, it'll be like I'm stalking people. Oh, helpful if I know which card I sent you last year.
I'm a mess, yes.
Recently finished books include An Abundance of Katherines which made me wait until the very end to get the story on each Katherine, and the abundance of Roman Numerals drove me insane. Yeah, well, bite me. Sixteen, a book of short stories about the obvious [wherein the authors I normally love most let me down, and the ones I didn't know did not. World. Spinning!], Six Reasons to Stay a Virgin which wasn't quite what I thought it would be.
And Living Dead Girl which is still sort of percolating in my system. I was expecting this big emotional punch to the chest, and the thing is, I must be a black hearted bitch because where I expected to be left reeling, I'm sort of waiting for the fall out. The book is about a girl who was abducted five years ago [right before her 10th birthday] by Ray, who believed in the fine art of abuse all across the lines, be it physical, sexual, or psychological. It's the last that keeps 'Alice' in her place, keeps her from doing something so simple as pouring fucking Draino down his throat and being done with it. I'm just going to assume that at nine she hadn't seen Heathers or found a decent murder by poisoning movie on TV in the last five years. I'm sort of skipping ahead.
Alice is not the first Alice. The previous Alice was let go when she was fifteen and no longer enough of a child to satisfy Ray. First Alice was murdered and then her family was killed shortly thereafter in a tragic burglary gone wrong. Which we all know means Ray murdered them, just as he did his mother years before. Until this piece of the puzzle is revealed, you believe Alice stays Alice to keep Ray from making good on his threat to kill her family if she should do anything to upset the balance in his life. Run away, they die. Call the police, they die. Do anything and they die. Before you believe he's incapable of making good on this threat [mother and First Alice aside], he brings her a lock of her mother's hair. He knows all about her family and she believes full well he'll do what he swears he will. You and I might argue that we've no proof that this is her mother's hair, but he does have the plans for the house she grew up in, and really, five years of abuse...
But once you find out that First Alice's family was killed anyway, my memory begins to trip up. Had second Alice known this and only just put the pieces together, which is why she begins to grasp at her one shot of freedom, or was she just too afraid to try and take him down before, so used to the pain and abuse? It's this piece of the puzzle that's driving me insane. You can hold a kid's family above them and tell them mess up and they die, and I believe the kid [or quite a few adults, really] would do whatever had to be done to keep them safe. But once you realize that safety is merely an illusion, wouldn't you just try in some other way to save them? Doing nothing as you've been doing will end horribly, just as you were told it wouldn't. G'ah.
Sadly, the most disturbing part of LDG is that when Ray grows tired of Alice and speaks of snatching another child, Alice is all too happy to help him. Anything to speed up the end to her abuse, although she knows full well that the end means her death. Alice has become Ray's to the degree that you believe that for her, death really is the only option. And this, I gather, is the sticking point with people. They believe Alice could be saved. That Alice just needs a lifetime trip to a therapist and love and cuddles and she could bounce back. Fair enough for other people, but the way Alice is portrayed I don't actually believe it would do her much good. She understands Ray because he's warped her enough that while she knows, on some level that she's wrong, she'll still do what he wants, still do what she wants, morality be damned. In general, bring on the bunnies and therapy. For Alice, she acknowledges that something inside is so broken, so twisted, that if she did escape, she still couldn't escape what he'd made her. Just as his mother broke him and twisted him into a monster, Ray has created a monster out of Alice.
Briefly she flares to life, less monster and more human that she will seem for most of the very short book, but really, you know how the book will end. It's there at the start, before you even pick the book up.
Alice dies. It's never explicitely said, but she's shot, Ray's dead, and your average gut wound? Not exactly the kind you walk away from even in fantastic health prior. When she says she's free, honey, she's dead. People seem to quibble over this, convinced it's a downer. No, the downer books are the ones where Ray would escape, taking Annabelle with him, going on to twist another person. Ray's dead. He ruined quite a few lives, but nothing on earth could make him pay for those crimes, so his death will have to do.
The moment that came closest to breaking my heart was right at the end. Last three pages, I believe, when you learn her real name.
Maybe there was a bit too much of a build up for me, although I didn't have to wait long to read it. These things happen. Or maybe next week I'll wake up and it'll hit. It's been known to happen occasionally.
Back to shopping, shivering, and wondering if we have munchable food.
I've got cards! You've got empty mailboxes. I'm just attempting to locate Cosmo and Wanda who should have some addresses already. I know, I'm a mess. This year I'm tucking addresses into my Hallmark card box, in my diary, and on calendars just to name a few. Dude, it'll be like I'm stalking people. Oh, helpful if I know which card I sent you last year.
I'm a mess, yes.
Recently finished books include An Abundance of Katherines which made me wait until the very end to get the story on each Katherine, and the abundance of Roman Numerals drove me insane. Yeah, well, bite me. Sixteen, a book of short stories about the obvious [wherein the authors I normally love most let me down, and the ones I didn't know did not. World. Spinning!], Six Reasons to Stay a Virgin which wasn't quite what I thought it would be.
And Living Dead Girl which is still sort of percolating in my system. I was expecting this big emotional punch to the chest, and the thing is, I must be a black hearted bitch because where I expected to be left reeling, I'm sort of waiting for the fall out. The book is about a girl who was abducted five years ago [right before her 10th birthday] by Ray, who believed in the fine art of abuse all across the lines, be it physical, sexual, or psychological. It's the last that keeps 'Alice' in her place, keeps her from doing something so simple as pouring fucking Draino down his throat and being done with it. I'm just going to assume that at nine she hadn't seen Heathers or found a decent murder by poisoning movie on TV in the last five years. I'm sort of skipping ahead.
Alice is not the first Alice. The previous Alice was let go when she was fifteen and no longer enough of a child to satisfy Ray. First Alice was murdered and then her family was killed shortly thereafter in a tragic burglary gone wrong. Which we all know means Ray murdered them, just as he did his mother years before. Until this piece of the puzzle is revealed, you believe Alice stays Alice to keep Ray from making good on his threat to kill her family if she should do anything to upset the balance in his life. Run away, they die. Call the police, they die. Do anything and they die. Before you believe he's incapable of making good on this threat [mother and First Alice aside], he brings her a lock of her mother's hair. He knows all about her family and she believes full well he'll do what he swears he will. You and I might argue that we've no proof that this is her mother's hair, but he does have the plans for the house she grew up in, and really, five years of abuse...
But once you find out that First Alice's family was killed anyway, my memory begins to trip up. Had second Alice known this and only just put the pieces together, which is why she begins to grasp at her one shot of freedom, or was she just too afraid to try and take him down before, so used to the pain and abuse? It's this piece of the puzzle that's driving me insane. You can hold a kid's family above them and tell them mess up and they die, and I believe the kid [or quite a few adults, really] would do whatever had to be done to keep them safe. But once you realize that safety is merely an illusion, wouldn't you just try in some other way to save them? Doing nothing as you've been doing will end horribly, just as you were told it wouldn't. G'ah.
Sadly, the most disturbing part of LDG is that when Ray grows tired of Alice and speaks of snatching another child, Alice is all too happy to help him. Anything to speed up the end to her abuse, although she knows full well that the end means her death. Alice has become Ray's to the degree that you believe that for her, death really is the only option. And this, I gather, is the sticking point with people. They believe Alice could be saved. That Alice just needs a lifetime trip to a therapist and love and cuddles and she could bounce back. Fair enough for other people, but the way Alice is portrayed I don't actually believe it would do her much good. She understands Ray because he's warped her enough that while she knows, on some level that she's wrong, she'll still do what he wants, still do what she wants, morality be damned. In general, bring on the bunnies and therapy. For Alice, she acknowledges that something inside is so broken, so twisted, that if she did escape, she still couldn't escape what he'd made her. Just as his mother broke him and twisted him into a monster, Ray has created a monster out of Alice.
Briefly she flares to life, less monster and more human that she will seem for most of the very short book, but really, you know how the book will end. It's there at the start, before you even pick the book up.
Alice dies. It's never explicitely said, but she's shot, Ray's dead, and your average gut wound? Not exactly the kind you walk away from even in fantastic health prior. When she says she's free, honey, she's dead. People seem to quibble over this, convinced it's a downer. No, the downer books are the ones where Ray would escape, taking Annabelle with him, going on to twist another person. Ray's dead. He ruined quite a few lives, but nothing on earth could make him pay for those crimes, so his death will have to do.
The moment that came closest to breaking my heart was right at the end. Last three pages, I believe, when you learn her real name.
Maybe there was a bit too much of a build up for me, although I didn't have to wait long to read it. These things happen. Or maybe next week I'll wake up and it'll hit. It's been known to happen occasionally.
Back to shopping, shivering, and wondering if we have munchable food.