stolen property man.

[impy]

BASICS

01. Your gender: Chiquita, banana.
02. Straight/gay/bi?: I am me, so label me as such. Gracias.
03. Single?: Si.
04. Want to be?: Grand-high-dictator of this horrid rock of a planet?
05. Your birthday: July 10, 1981. For some reason this date is like a sucking vortex for people's memories. People I've known since I was little can't remember this date... or how to spell my name. You know, maybe they just don't like me?
06. Age you act: A gazillion and four.
07. Age you wish you were: If wishes were fishes, I'd still be 22.
08. Your height: 5' 9. I'm tall compared to the shrimps 'round here, man. Tall!
09. The color of your eyes: Christ, I have eyes? Wait, grey.
10. Happy with it?: Well, they aren't swirly vortexes of doom, but they are my eyes, so... you can keep the horror behind door #2.
11. The color of your hair: dark blonde/light brown?
12. Happy with it?: Nope. I was so hoping it would turn purple on its own, but no luck.
13. Left/right/ambidextrous?: All hail the right handed me.
14. Your living arrangement? :Well, see, I had a long talk with this deity and they said I could live. Very simple arrangement.
15. Your family: Mommy, Daddy, annoying brother, nephew, and then some cousins, aunts, uncles, but no grands.
16. What's your job?: Dictator-in-training.
17. Piercings?: I've got ears. they should still be pierced.
18. Tattoos?: Tattoo... no.
19. Obsessions?: I don't obsess! You cannae prove it. Charmed, Gilmore Girls, Tara from Buffy, Amber Benson, HMC, Savage Garden [it flairs up occasionally], Tori, comic books, trading cards [so... shiny!] and a half a billion other things.
20. Do you speak another language?: Not really, unless you don't speak English, in which case to you I do.
21. Have a favorite quote?: "i'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fiiine" or something like that from Toys [I like this because her head pops off.]
22. Do you have a webpage?: Si.
23. Sports? Demonic tricks to get people paid gobs of money so they can then justify killing people and still be adored throughout the world.

DEEP THOUGHTS about life and you in it

01. Do you live in the moment?: *cues the Spice Girls* No. I'm a cancer. we live in the past.
02. Do you consider yourself tolerant of others?: Depends on how much they're pissing me off, now doesn't it?
03. Do you have any secrets?: Aye.
04. Do you hate yourself?: Hate is such a strong word... I hate things about me though.
05. Do you like your handwriting?: Nope. Ugly, hard to read, and not even snazzy on some level.
06. Do you have any bad habits?: Well, there is my tendancy to beat people up on days that end in "y"...
07. What is the compliment you get most from people?: "You're not half as fucked up as I thought you'd be"? No, wait. Umm, is it a compliment when someone decides that they will describe their perfect beloved and they want your brain in some super model's body? I don't think it is, but there's always this stupid grin that seems to imply it is a good thing.
08. If a movie were made about your life, what would it be called?: ThisIsACrappyMovieStarringNooneYou'veHeardOf?
09. What's your biggest fear?: monkeys. Like I'm really going to announce that and give people ammo against me? Yeah, right.
10. Can you sing: Uh, along with the radio, sure.
11. Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?: Nope, can't say I do.
12. Are you a loner?: But she was always so nice and polite...[yes.]
13. If you were another person, would you be friends with you?: If I were another person I wouldn't be me, now would I?
14. Are you a daredevil?: Yes, I am an incredibly lame movie that proved that Jennifer Lopez should not be allowed to date anyone famous as she sucks their talent away. You found me out.
15. Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?: Well, yeah. I'm not real. I'm a movie. Pay attention! ... yes.
16. Are you passive or aggressive?: I'll kick your ass, bitch. Okay, so I won't, but I bet some people are afraid I might. [not.]
17. Have you got a question?: Am I being paid by the hour for this?
18. What is your greatest strength and weakness?: S- My ability to mock things to death? Dunno. Weakness - I'm unable to summon up my inner bitch in order to do the most mundane of things.
19. If you could change one thing about yourself?: I would be even more fantabulous.
20. There are three wells: love, beauty and creativity, which one do you choose?: Depends on what you mean, man. If love makes you more lovable or brings someone specific to love you, then woo. If it just makes you write awful poetry about it, then you might as well go for creativity so the poetry can be fantastic while you're alone.
21. How do you vent?: ...vent?
22. Do you think you are emotionally strong?: I talk the talk, but don't expect me to walk the walk.
23. Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?: Yeah. In second grade I was really tan and I didn't wear that all white outfit despite the fact that I was adorable. The next year, all the cuteness went away. I'm sure I regret certain things, but not to the point where they keep me up at night.
24. Do you think life has been good so far?: I'm not chained to someone's wall, so... I consider that a good thing. Although some people...
25. What is the most important lesson you've learned from life?: She's a fickle lass? She who laughs last thinks the slowest?
26. What do you like the most about your body?: I can out pout anyone, damn it.
27. And least?: The rest? Nah. Most of the rest.
28. Do you think you are good looking?: Who are we comparing me to? Cuz usually, no.
29. Are you confident?: By asking this, you have proven you know me not.
30. What is the fictional character you're most like?: ... um... could I go with early Tara, except not super witch, not believed to be demonic, and not dating super witch? Nor do I stutter, but the painfully shy, rather not speak thing works.
31. Do people know how you feel?: Yes. I am the comfy-est pillow around. Wait, did you mean emotionally or something?
32. Are you perceived wrongly?: I dunno, how do you percieve me? I wasn't aware anyone had any real perceptions of me. Enlighten me!

DO YOU...

01. Smoke?: *gags*
02. Do drugs?: Nuh uh. I'm this weird naturally.
03. Read the newspaper?: And mock. Oh how I mock.
04. Pray?: Sometimes.
05. Go to church?: Would if my favorite time to go hadn't been turned into the Teen crapfest hour. Ugh.
06. Talk to strangers who IM you?: Not since that incident with the one eyed dude.
07. Sleep with stuffed animals?: Kink! Yes.
08. Take walks in the rain?: Okay, see, I could quote some song goodness now, but I won't. And occasionally when I need to think or catch my death of cold.
09. Talk to people even though you hate them?: That's why minions were invented.
10. Drive?: people crazy.
11. Like to drive fast?: Nope. I get twitchy. It's really counterproductive.

HAVE YOU EVER...

01. Liked your voice?: There was this whole one sided relationship, man.
02. Hurt yourself?: Intentionally? Are you trying to dance around something that could set people off?
03. Been out of the country?: Does my mind count as a country? Cuz I've been out of that.
04. Eaten something that made other people sick?: Worsteshire sauce. Shove it, missy.
05. Burped?: ... are you slow?
06. Been unfaithful?: Boil the bunny!
07. Been in love?: Aye. Wait, can't say aye to that because I got that from someone I wasn't in love with. Whoops.
08. Done drugs?: Nope.
09. Gone skinny dipping?: No, but I was in a hot tub when people decided to strip underwater and I can honestly say, ew.
10. Had a surgery?: Not that I'm aware of.
11. Ran away from home?: Not really.
12. Played strip poker?: Nup.
13. Gotten beaten up?: Do sibling fights count?
14. Been picked on?: High.School.
15. Been on stage?: elementary school chorus count?
16. Been so drunk that you know you're supposed to go out on a date with someone, but you can't remember with who or when and that you faint when you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning, not to mention your breath?: Never been drunk. So... no.
17. Thought about suicide?: As in attempting, seriously? I think about it in an abstract way sometimes, but not as in a viable way out.
18. Pulled an all-nighter?: Aye.
19. If yes, what is your record?: Three days voluntarily, five days when I had a cold. I was verging on insanity...
20. Gone one day without food?: Don't remember. If I did, it didn't really register.
21. Talked on the phone all night?: Define all night.
22. Slept together with the opposite sex without actually having sex?: Well, if you're gay, or even bi, is this really fair to ask since they get off scott free? :p And yes.
23. Slept all day?: Yup.
24. Killed someone?: Well, there was that one drifter last summer...
25. Made out with a stranger?: Nuh uh.
26. Had sex with a stranger?: ...nope.
27. Thought you're going crazy?: Define "crazy" and I'll define sane.
28. Kissed the same sex?: Nup, though I could have used that twenty bucks.
29. Done anything sexual with the same sex?: Nup.
30. Been betrayed?: Yup. Sorta, kinda, yeah.
31. Had a dream that came true?: Nope.
32. Broken the law?: Yup, but you can't prove it.
33. Met a famous person?: I am me, isn't that famous enough for you?
34. Have you ever killed an animal by accident?: as opposed to on purpose?
35. Stolen anything?: Sticky fingers! Yes. A marble from a store display when I was 8 or something.
36. Been on radio/TV.?: If you count those stupid local TV spots. My mom taped one, and I missed the other. I'm sure I looked like a dork in both.
37. Been in a mosh-pit?: Yes. It didn't start out that way, but then people ignored the signs. Fuckers.
38. Had a nervous breakdown?: Nope, but I wouldn't rule it out as a possibility.
39. Considered religious vocation?: Yup.
40. Been criticized about your sexual performance?: Not to my face for a variety of reasons.
41. Bungee jumped?: Nope, can't say I have.
42. Had a dream that kept coming back?: Do nightmares count?

CLOTHES and other fashion

01. Shoe brand?: the ones with which to kick your arse.
02. Brand of clothing?: *shrugs*
03. Cologne/perfume?: *still shrugging*
04. What are you normally wearing to school/work?: work was a white shirt, blue pants, and a forced smile.
05. Wear hats?: I'm not a hat person.
06. Judge other people by their clothing?: to what extent?
07. Wear make-up?: yup.
08. Favorite place to shop?: used to be the comic store. now... enh.
09. Favorite article of clothing?: my "I know everything, just ask me... or don't. I'll tell you anyway" shirt.
10. Are you trendy?: Not in the slightest.
11. Would you rather wear a uniform to school?: rather than what? going naked? getting to pick your own clothes? Honestly, wouldn't have cared, although that was the main reason I didn't get sent to the catholic high school. the parentals thought uniforms would be bad.

BELIEFS

01. Believe in life on other planets?: why the hell not?
02. Miracles?: yup
03. Astrology?: Sometimes.
04. Magic?: Some.
05. God?: A higher being, yeah.
06. Satan?: Dunno, actually.
07. Santa?: Not so much.
08. Ghosts?: Yush.
09. Luck?: Good and bad.
10. Love at first sight?: More like love at first meeting. Not so much at first sight, although I guess I believe some people just know.
11. Yin and Yang?: Si.
12. Witches?: Whether I believe or not, they still exist in some form. Technically.
13. Easter bunny?: Yes. He killed Santa but kept the egg franchise.
14. Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: Absolutely.
15. Believe there's a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?: And a silver lining to all things bad?
16. Do you wish on stars?: Yup, for all the good it does me.

LOVE, and all that jazz

01. Did you get frightened or uncomfortable seeing that as a section title?: Only when I thought it was going to dance around in fringed outfights.
02. Do you remember your first love?: Yup
03. Still love him/her?: Si.
04. Do you consider love a mistake?: Sometimes you fall for the wrong person, but then I wonder if you really love love them, or whether signals got crossed cosmically. Sometimes it can be though, I guess.
05. What do you find romantic?: ...stuff.
06. Turn-on?: Wit?
07. Turn-off?: Stupidity and overt gross-ness.
08. Do you base your judgment on looks alone?: Yes. You found me out.
09. If someone you had no interest in dating expressed interest in dating you, how would you feel?: Shocked as that'd mean hell does exist and that it either thawed or froze the fuck over.
10. Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them or going "blind"?: Hey, keep the blind jokes to yourself.
11. Have you ever wished it was more "socially acceptable" for a girl to ask a guy out?: No, I wish for other things, but that's never actually made the list.
12. Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive?: Beauty, my dear, is in the eye of the beholder. Some people don't get that.
13. Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?: *snorts*
14. What is best about the opposite sex?: The general lack of catty behavior.
15. What's the worst thing about the opposite sex?: There's only so much disgusting a person can take.
16. What's the last present someone gave you?: A doll from Cassaliscious.
17. Are you in love?: I'll let you know for sure if I ever manage to see them again.
18. Do you consider your significant other hot?: Didn't we establish the single-ness?
19. What would you do if you were walking down the street and saw some hot guy/girl standing on the sidewalk?: Wonder where they found a sidewalk in this town.

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON...

01. That haunted you?: the ex.
02. You wanted to kill?: the rent a cop?
03. That you laughed at?: myself. I'm that funny.
04. That laughed at you?: Couldn't tell you. My mother, probably. Unless you've laughed while reading this, and then it was you.
05. That turned you on?: *cough* Uh, not telling.
06. You went shopping with?: Cass.
07. That broke your heart?: The ex.
08. To disappoint you?: The person who refuses to dump her idiotic beloved.
09. To make you cry?: The ex. Or me.
10. To brighten up your day?: *points to the friends list* Pick someone.
11. That you thought about?: Jake/A2 because they're the people I'm copying this from.
12. You saw a movie with?: Ari, I'm sure.
13. You talked to on the phone?: I didn't do any of the talking. Cass.
14. You talked to through IM?: Jake. It's been out of commision for ages.
15. You saw?: Mummy dearest.
16. You lost?: I don't misplace people all that often.
17. You thought was completely insane?: Moi?
18. You wanted to be?: Moi.
19. You told off?: Cass for all the good that did me.
20. You trusted?: ...what is this word... trust?
21. You turned down?: Someone who wanted me to do something?

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU

01. Smiled?: Smiles=bad. I smirk.
02. Laughed?: When I read today's Get Fuzzy.
03. Cried?: 24 hours ago.
04. Bought something?: I sweet talked someone out of something. before that, I don't recall.
05. Danced?: I don't dance.
06. Were sarcastic?: *points up*
07. Hugged someone?: Today/yesterday. The nephew.
08. Talked to an ex?: Monday maybe.
09. Watched your fave movie?: I don't have a favorite movie, so, uh, never?
10. Had a nightmare?: Sometime in the last week.
11. Talked on the phone?: Friday afternoon, I think.
12. Listened to the radio?: Right. Now.
13. Watched TV?: Whenever Weekenders was on?
14. Went out?: To the store earlier? Or like, party out? I don't do the latter.
15. Helped someone?: Friday.
16. Were mean?: *wide eyed innocent look* I am never mean.
17. Sang?: Along with the radio. Friday.
18. Saw a movie in a theatre?: I don't remember.
19. Said "I love you"?: It's been awhile since I said that exact phrase.
20. Missed someone?: Today.
21. Fought with a family member?: Not within the last week.
22. Fought with a friend?: Whenever I told C-ass off?
23. Had a serious conversation?: I do not have serious conversations. Well, I do, but it's been awhile.
24. Got drunk?: A few days past never.
25. Had sex?: See above.