She actually referenced brain bleach.

[impy]

^ Mumsy's. They're just holding this place until I can wrap my mind about Breaking Dawn.

Yay me, I finished Breaking Dawn and my head didn't split. Where's my prize?



It wasn't as bad as I feared. But I'll admit that I did start to take Stephenie Meyer's name in vain. On more than one occasion. So, let's get to the obvious.

I'm not sure if there's a segment of the population that really, really enjoys the Super!Vampire!Hybrid baby stories that always appear in these sorts of things, but there's got to be some reason as to why they keep cropping up. And you can substitute vampire with whatever super special supernatural or otherworldly is currently running through your book/movie/TV show/whatever.

And they're always so super awesome that everyone loves/fears/loves to fear them/is afraid to love them and it's all just supposed to be so friggin' fantastical. And it so rarely is. I still remember being more than a little outraged when Kalika appeared in the Last Vampire series, and you should've seen my head go splodey at Imara appearing in the Weather Warden series. See Cordelia for why these mystical, magical pregnancies are a bad idea. And even they went back to the well for it a second time. Oi.

So, no. I can't really say I was as taken with Nessie as I suspect I was expected to be. I was rooting for her to be the evil, blood thirsty thing I wanted to be, and yet I knew that there was no way in hell SM would let that happen because it would go against everything Bella believed and it would have horrible consequences.

And yet, knowing that much, I still expected there to be a fight at the end. I even waved goodbye to Garret as he made his speech. But... nothing! Alice arrives to save the day, and Bella gets all the credit and of course she's super special and... I'm still ready for a fight. I'll have to see if I've got a book I haven't read yet that looks promising in terms of blood lust. Because there was a decided lack of it, my friends. And while I'm glad that say, Alice and Jacob didn't die, I could probably have lived without Rosalie.

Therein might lie the problem for me. I was applying the rules of my vampire expectations on a world that is made, quite literally, of sparkles. I was raised to expect the awful to eventually happen, not just ride into town, kill a C-lister, and then skulk away without a fight. I expect damage and a death toll. I do not expect sparkles.

Because sparkles are what you want in reality, but in fiction, and even in reality, you know that it will not work out that way. Or maybe I'm just warped? I don't know. I guess it's sort a balance to the bloodshed over in Harry Potter's finale, huh? One bled too many characters and one couldn't bear to part with anyone for the most part. Like how if you smoosh the last Betsy book [MJD] with the latest LKH books the body counts sort of counteract one another. One had too many [Antonia! No! Garrett the second, no!] and the other will never be able to shed its excess characters.

So. Nessie being imprinted. I try not to speak aloud to my books. It's a sign of the crazy in the first order and I really do try not to act out the crazy cat woman girl persona too much, but yeah, when Jacob is sucked in by those eyes, I actually had to howl a big fat, "Nooooooooooooooo!"

But the moment I stopped reading came a little before then, when I realized that within thirty pages or so, maybe more, I'd go back to Bella's perspective. It was the only time I didn't have the book with me today. I couldn't face more Bella when she was so sparkle-blinded in the first section. I have to say that vampirism agreed with Bella, although I cry foul on her getting shielding AND avoiding blood lust entirely. She was less blinded by Edward, although she was probably drawn even more to him, but it wasn't as annoying. It was as if she grew up ten years, at least, in the time it took for her to burn through her humanity. I'm just not sure if points should be taken away for that or not.

Points were awarded for her attacking Jacob for calling Reneesme [the stupidest name in the world? No, but up there on the charts of WTF, and yes, I'm too lazy to look up how it's actually spelled] Nessie because it was funny. Also points were given for Jacob wanting brain bleach, because, honey, at that point I'd have knocked it back, too.

For the most part, the third part of the book wasn't as painful as I was expecting, lack of bloodshed aside. But... what happens to Leah? I need to know this. As soon as Jacob became a slave to Nessie, my interest decreased dramatically. Apparently I need my misery fix, and I think Leah was sort of angling towards Jacob and then he was snatched away, too. So, misery fix was right there and I was denied it in favor of Nessie. Un.Cool!



I always feel a little strange when I come out of a book coma. And it never helps when I come out just as everyone else has gone to bed. I feel all... disconnected.