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I don't know whether I've mentioned this before, but this January my uncle (Dad's brother) went into the hospital for one reason or another and then things kept snowballing. He didn't come out of the hospital until sometime last week, or maybe last Saturday. I gather my aunt thought that going home would be magical but it wasn't, so they decided (and I don't know how much input he gave to this decision) to stop his heart machine and let, as they say, nature take its course.
He died last night around 8:45pm. Which is about the same time of day Dad died, and the same day of the week, though obviously separated by years and months. I found all this out when my brother called me less than twenty minutes into my shift to tell me and then told me not to tell Mom until this morning, at home.
And the person I would normally ask, "Hey, is this a stupid idea or should I spare her?" is no longer capable of answering such things on a regular basis. (Ari.)
Before getting off the phone, he told me that per the aunt's request, we were not to post anything to social media. Considering she's been updating every other minute I find this a bit rich and annoying, but I comply. Mostly because I don't have FB on my phone. He also suggests looking up the younger set of kids on FB and reading their posts.
Which I do when I make it home and after I've told Mom and Widget and then feel insanely guilty for not telling her ASAP last night.
So. Back to the cousins. Daughter has essentially a countdown for saying goodbye, like "Today will be the hardest day ever" which I don't begrudge her, but the subsequent updates about it just seem like an actual countdown. Including the one with a picture of her holding his hand and summing it up with, "the waiting is the hardest part."
I'm pretty sure the part where he's about to be dead is harder, but different strokes and all.
This, however, is topped by her brother who has a bigger picture of him holding his father's hand and what I suspect is meant to be a moving tribute to his father in like, under three sentences. One of which is nothing but fucking hashtags. Who uses hashtags in a memorial? WHO?
How is that appropriate? Shit, I know I'm old, but holy crapmuffins, WHY? How do you sit there and think that's a good idea? I get that grief fucks you up something hardcore (trust me, I know) but... there is a time and place for everything and this was neither.
I will miss my uncle. He was funny and smart mouthed and he drove like a bat out of hell, which he blamed on being a cop. He was also the only person in that little part of his family (this does not include the first set of kids) that I can honestly say I liked. He was nice to my mother, which isn't something you can say about everyone in the family, and sometimes he would call and chat with Dad. I wish he'd come to Dad's service but they went on a cruise instead so... that kind of tells you what you need to know. (To clarify, they weren't on the cruise at the time, they could have actually still done both but chose not to.)
On the plus side, I found out that the boy and I still retain our ability to stand off to the side and mutter things back and forth that would probably get us both smacked if any of the adults heard... or, y'know, have them join in.
Seriously though, hashtags?
He died last night around 8:45pm. Which is about the same time of day Dad died, and the same day of the week, though obviously separated by years and months. I found all this out when my brother called me less than twenty minutes into my shift to tell me and then told me not to tell Mom until this morning, at home.
And the person I would normally ask, "Hey, is this a stupid idea or should I spare her?" is no longer capable of answering such things on a regular basis. (Ari.)
Before getting off the phone, he told me that per the aunt's request, we were not to post anything to social media. Considering she's been updating every other minute I find this a bit rich and annoying, but I comply. Mostly because I don't have FB on my phone. He also suggests looking up the younger set of kids on FB and reading their posts.
Which I do when I make it home and after I've told Mom and Widget and then feel insanely guilty for not telling her ASAP last night.
So. Back to the cousins. Daughter has essentially a countdown for saying goodbye, like "Today will be the hardest day ever" which I don't begrudge her, but the subsequent updates about it just seem like an actual countdown. Including the one with a picture of her holding his hand and summing it up with, "the waiting is the hardest part."
I'm pretty sure the part where he's about to be dead is harder, but different strokes and all.
This, however, is topped by her brother who has a bigger picture of him holding his father's hand and what I suspect is meant to be a moving tribute to his father in like, under three sentences. One of which is nothing but fucking hashtags. Who uses hashtags in a memorial? WHO?
How is that appropriate? Shit, I know I'm old, but holy crapmuffins, WHY? How do you sit there and think that's a good idea? I get that grief fucks you up something hardcore (trust me, I know) but... there is a time and place for everything and this was neither.
I will miss my uncle. He was funny and smart mouthed and he drove like a bat out of hell, which he blamed on being a cop. He was also the only person in that little part of his family (this does not include the first set of kids) that I can honestly say I liked. He was nice to my mother, which isn't something you can say about everyone in the family, and sometimes he would call and chat with Dad. I wish he'd come to Dad's service but they went on a cruise instead so... that kind of tells you what you need to know. (To clarify, they weren't on the cruise at the time, they could have actually still done both but chose not to.)
On the plus side, I found out that the boy and I still retain our ability to stand off to the side and mutter things back and forth that would probably get us both smacked if any of the adults heard... or, y'know, have them join in.
Seriously though, hashtags?
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