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impy
Once upon a time, I watched a fair amount of TV and fell in love with three different actresses for very different shows. There was Alyssa Milano on Who's The Boss?, there was Shannen Doherty on Beverly Hills, 90210 as well as Our House (and let us never forget the perfect movie that was Heathers), and Holly Marie Combs in Picket Fences.
Now. Imagine my sheer, unadulterated glee at realizing all three would be in the same show and it would be about witches? I'm pretty sure if you listen carefully, you can still hear younger!me squeeing about it even now. Yes, that high pitched shriek that's been bothering you for more than 20 years at this point is me shrieking at a show pretty much perfectly tailored to me. Later that joy will turn to bitterness but let's not dwell on that. Nope.
I was beyond excited. And let me tell you, Charmed was hyped prior to its release. They went hard on the Shannen working with Aaron Spelling again angle. Somewhere, if I felt like digging around for it, I have one of those TV Weekly (not guide) things that has a cover story about it. Yes. Still have it. Anyway, to say I was excited is probably an understatement. Ari and I had plans to watch it together since I'd be staying there while we waited for the new house to finish whatever hang-up we had going (it was cursed, we should've listened). And then I got kicked out of their house for being a witch so there's that. Dead serious in case you thought I was kidding about that before. I'm not sure why in the hell we thought we'd watch a show about witches under that roof but we did and ah, to be so naive again.
I've said it before, but one of the only reasons I did manage to get to see the pilot when it aired is because my brother's best friend at the time was SUPER into Dawson's Creek and so he and I voted against my brother and commandeered the TV for the first two hours of serious prime time. Huzzah! So I watched Something Wicca This Way Comes with two teenage boys. Yay?
Enough preamble. Let's get onto the rewatch.
Honestly, the pilot is a good, solid episode. It's not earth shattering and awesome and something that sets up the series for failure to live up to that initial promise, but it's also not "sweet baby Jesus, what did I just watch?" I still remember the feeling I had after first watching it and thinking that while it wasn't AH-MAZING I wanted to know more and the wait might kill me.
Charmed has always worked best when it focused on the sisters who are witches not witches who are sisters angle and the pilot exemplifies this.
We begin with a blonde witch who is setting up her altar and lighting candles with ~magic~ and I hope you like this shot because it's gonna be in the credits for the rest of forever. She's then startled by someone coming into her apartment and then there's the moment of, "Oh, it's you!" before our hooded figure stabs her and we move on to Piper scurrying up the walkway to the Manor (legitimate star of the show, let's be honest) as a storm rolls through the area.
Right away we find out that Prue is the responsible if a bit crabby sister, Piper is the conflict averse cook in the family, and Phoebe is the aimless younger sister with no vision for the future. Prue and Piper moved back to the Manor after their grandmother, Grams, died, and the house has serious issues. Also worth noting? Prue is very clearly the one going around fixing most of these problems because she knows where everything is and seems pretty comfortable around the breaker box. We have a little back and forth about Piper's boyfriend, her job hunt, and Phoebe not exactly being welcome back at Halliwell Manor.
From the look on Piper's face, we know this is going to be an issue and soon. Sure enough, just as she's breaking the idea to Prue, Phoebe herself turns up, fresh from a stint in New York that did not go as planned. It's implied later in the episode that she was there partly to look for their father, but in any case Phoebe is back and Prue is NOT happy. Could it simply be the fact that Prue has always had to be the more responsible, stick in the mud type since their mother died when they were all so young or could it maybe have something to do with the fact that Prue's onetime fiance accused Phoebe of coming onto him at the very least? Hrmm. Tough call. At any rate, Prue informs Phoebe that they are not selling the house to pay Phoebe's debt and Phoebe's annoyed that Prue thinks that's why she's back. I mean, Phoebe, you did take a cab to the house and then forget to pay it so now Piper is outside paying the cabbie with Prue's money but sure. Be annoyed. Phoebe decides to skip right over that and inform Prue in no uncertain terms did she lay a finger on Roger the fiance, but the moment doesn't really go as planned and the sisters each head to different parts of the house.
Piper and Phoebe bond a bit over the spirit board Prue found earlier and when Piper gets up to refill the popcorn, the pointer moves all on its own. Phoebe eventually finds her voice and calls for Piper, causing both of her older sisters to appear and ask her if she moved the pointer because she always moved the pointer. Eventually the board spells out ATTIC and then the power goes out. Piper's ready to go running out the front door to boyfriend Jeremy's apartment even though she just saw him on TV working on a story about a murdered woman, while Prue is sensibly going to try and figure out the breaker box in the basement. Phoebe, however, is off to the attic because ADVENTURE AWAITS! Also, when the spirit board of your youth tells you to get your ass to the attic, I guess you get your ass to the attic?
Turns out that neither Piper nor Prue has managed to get into the attic since they moved back in, which is something I'd forgotten. Phoebe tries the door and it won't budge until she turns around to head back down the stairs and then it magically opens. Phoebe cautiously pokes around the room and then follows the spotlight to a trunk by the big window and tadaaaaaaaa. The book of shadows is found. She dusts off the book and then, in a move that Xander Harris would approve, reads aloud from the book and unleashes the power of the Charmed Ones.
The same hooded figure from before watches from the street but none of the sisters senses that anything has changed even though we know it has.
In the morning, we find that Phoebe hasn't slept all night, choosing instead to stay up and read the BoS. Piper is off to her audition and Prue managed to sneak out of the house early to head in to work. Y'know. With Roger, Prue's boss at the museum where she works this episode. She's clearly been there awhile and she's clearly better at her job than he is, but naturally because he's a douchebag and a dude, he's going to claim her success as his own and take all the glory. Prue decides she's had enough of this and eventually quits, but not before her powers manifest. First his ink pen ruins his shirt and then later, when Prue actually walks in on him claiming her work as his own, she quits and makes a strangling motion with her hands as she walks away and his tie tries to choke him.
But please, reboot, tell me more about how you're going to be feminist right out the gate while the original was not. Please. Enlighten me. Bonus points if you use your male whitelighter to do so even though Phoebe was the one to originally figure most of this out.
Back to the show. Piper is hard at work on her recipe and is about to add the final touch when Chef Moore goes to take a taste. Piper freaks out and freezes time and I take a moment to ponder whether she'd really be allowed to wear nail polish, particularly dark polish, as a chef. She adds her port and he declares her work magnifique and she gets the gig. We should all take a moment to admire how adorable HMC is because she really, truly is.
Phoebe's the last of the group to manifest her powers as they don't show up til she's out for a bike ride when she has a premonition of two kids being hit by a car. Seconds later she sees the car and the kids and she heads off the accident by... throwing herself (and her bike) in front of the kids. She hurts her arm enough to wind up at the hospital where Prue comes to pick her up... and run into her other old flame, Inspector Andy Trudeau.
Andy and Prue flirt a bit and then Prue and Phoebe are off to see more of Prue's powers at play, which culminates in a scene at the pharmacy where Phoebe discovers that Prue's powers are tied to her emotions, particularly anger. Phoebe provokes Prue by mentioning their father and the aisle goes to hell and it's funny as hell... until I remember that I work in a similar store and would have to clean that mess up. :P
Flip back to Piper who is heading off to celebrate with Jeremy after they take a weird detour to see some building Jeremy wants to show off. He lets it slip that he knows Phoebe is back in town and so we know for sure he's the hooded killer and then it's time for the villain monologue. Warlocks (evil witches for this show) kill good witches in order to steal their powers and Jeremy somehow knew that Piper was a witch even before Grams died six months ago. He's been biding his time, waiting for Phoebe to return and unlock their powers and now he's gonna steal Piper's powers. Dude doesn't even know what they are at this point, but I guess any power will do? Piper freezes him and attempts to crawl out of the elevator, but Jeremy unfreezes before she's completely free, so she hits him with some lumber and books it back home to alert her sisters to the fact that warlocks are definitely real and ohshit are they in trouble. But how much trouble can they be in considering Jeremy has to stab them and he holds his athame ever so gingerly that a good sneeze would send that sucker flying.
Luckily, Phoebe spent all night reading the book, remember? So she has an idea and we get our first spell that for whatever reason does not get rid of Jeremy so much as force thorns to sprout from his body and piss him off even more than he already was. Phoebe sees his new form and warns her sisters the spell failed and then they all run to the front door where... Jeremy is waiting. Prue holds Jeremy back while Piper and Phoebe run back upstairs to the attic before being forced upstairs herself. They try to barricade themselves in safely but one of Jeremy's powers is telekinesis and he just slowly moves everything away from the door that he then blows to smithereens anyway. Ohnoes, what are our heroines to do?
They grab hands and recite part of the inscription from the spirit board. The power of three will set us free. This is going to get used a lot over the series, so don't fall for any drinking games that want you to take more than shot for each instance of it. You will die.
The next morning we find Prue outside getting the paper as Andy comes by to invite her out for dinner Friday night. Prue wants to say yes but is worried that her new life as a witch will make dating impossible, so she instead asks if she can call him. Prue and Andy are adorable even if they never fully clicked for me (it was an actor chemistry thing), so I'm curious as to whether I'll find that less of a stumbling block this go round. When Phoebe and Piper appear (Phoebe heard a man's voice, the jokes are writing themselves and it's only episode 1), Andy notices that Phoebe is carrying the cat from his murder scene back at the start of the episode. Suspicious!
The episode ends with Prue using her power to close the front door and an iconic ending is born.
A lot of things work for Something Wicca This Way Comes. It's not painfully dated in anything other than fashion and currently the 90's are having a comeback so even that's not a big thing. The sisters are realistic in their squabbles. Prue versus Phoebe feels real and so does their attempt at bonding after the pharmacy fiasco. Piper's ability to be friends with both works and I like her acknowledgment that she and Phoebe had things easier as kids than Prue did. It sets Prue up to be a bit more standoffish, but it's clear that she and Piper are close considering they had an apartment together. Romantic history is hinted at in various ways for all three sisters, from Piper's easy going romance with Jeremy, to Prue's spark for Andy, and let us not forget the PITA that is Roger for both Phoebe and Prue.
On the powers front, I relate so freaking hardcore to Phoebe. While both Piper and Prue lament not being normal anymore, Phoebe is practically dancing in the street at the idea of not being normal, at being something more than she was yesterday. She's super into her birthright and she immediately throws herself into research mode. I won't say I forgot how much I loved early Phoebe, because I knew... and it's part of why I have so many problems with her characterization in the later seasons. S1 Phoebe is snarky, defensive, and abrasive at times, but she also wants to be better and to be more. She wants to earn her place back in her family and if she gets to learn some interesting family history along the way, all the better.
The show also sets up things that will later pay off. Andy's suspicions about the cat and what it means that the Halliwells have it, Morris being dragged into the occult whether he wants to be or not, Melinda Warren, and even their father issues even if that one is going to be something I will rant about until the day I die. Also, the running theme of all three sisters having less than stellar luck in love, though I do think it's adorable that the morning after Piper's boyfriend nearly kills her remaining family, she's still the one to tell Prue that not only do witches date, they get the best guys. Is it because she's a hopeless romantic? Well, yes, but also she knows that Prue needs a push towards Andy and goddamn it, I'm sucked right back in.
Yes, its probably best not to look too hard at the attempt at Wicca and I should mention that the special effects are probably dated as well, but they were then too so eh. Jeremy's handing of the athame while trying to menace Piper is laughably bad and I kind of wish we'd gotten the reveal about Jeremy later on in the series... but not really because just looking at him you knew he was a bad guy.
The magic works because the underlying sisterhood works and while I probably wouldn't list this episode as my favorite, it's definitely worth a watch.
And because I like quotes, I shall share a few.
She didn't direct jack. She was stabbed, pure and simple. - Darryl Morris, being ever so blunt.
You look surprised.
I don't know why, I'm furious. - Roger and Prue. This has been one of my favorites for, oh, the last 20 years. Just the way she delivers the line is perfection.
This is a blink and you'll literally miss it scene but it's worth the price someone paid to gif it.
Also, noting this so I can remember to pay attention when they do go back in time for Melinda: the incantation Phoebe reads to unbind their powers mentions we sisters three... but I don't recall a single instance of the Halliwells prior to this having three sisters. I know the cousins come up in S2, but it's a bit weird to have the very first spell in the book be for three sisters when it's such a specific and rare thing.
Oh, and I'm pretty sure the generic intro music Netflix is currently using is the outro music that shows up on the DVDs.
See you next week for I've Got You Under My Skin. You can watch along on Netflix or pick up the DVDs for insanely cheap considering the remastered version is coming out at the end of the month.
